Return to site

Compassion & Closure with COVID.

This will be my one and only post about COVID, to vax or not, and my current take on the entire pandemic.

So with deep compassion for your needs and feelings, for your fears and concerns, and what you believe is the right or wrong way to approach this here we go.

I think that both the vax and anitvax camps are looking for ways to feel safe, and are making the best judgment calls for themselves based on what they believe to be the best approach from their own reality bias.

I think that there will be information available, from either side, that will support that reality bias and that people's actual physical reactivity to vaccines will be based on their levels of sensitivity.

I, personally, have no intention of getting the vaccine. I have no more fear of COVID than I do of a common flu, (which I have never been vaccinated against). I fully respect anyone who does get a COVID or a flu vaccine, for that matter. I respect anyone who does not. What I do not respect is any type of name-calling, or dehumanization from either camp towards the other for how they go about approaching personal wellbeing and safety.

My concerns about the vaccine:

It is largely untested. It was rushed through development and there is no telling what the longterm effects will be. This will not be a one-time thing. It will require booster shots. Once it is in our system it will need to be constantly upgraded, and that the potential degradation of our natural immune responses has not been taken into consideration.

Pharmaceutical companies cannot be held liable, nor indemnified, for side-effects—injury or death—from vaccinations. This was a supreme court ruling.

For that, and other reasons, taking the vaccine will be a, no, for me for the foreseeable future. It is a possibility that as new information emerges that I may change my position or that I will become more rooted into it. Time will tell.

In regards to vaccine shedding:

It seems that, as with vaccine sensitivity, it will be a real thing for some people. Our bodies are not all wired the same way and will not respond to either the introduction of foreign compounds, nor to the detoxification, of them the same. (People who are already immunocompromised have the right and responsibility to be particularly concerned about this component of vaccination.) This being said, the majority of vaccines in the US are not made from a live virus, and it is this type of vaccine that will lead to shedding. 

Every body is different and responds differently to different foods, chemical compounds and stimulation.

This is why body autonomy, research, and responsibility need to be at the center of this conversation—not shame. Be curious, get informed and take care of yourself and those around you to the best of your ability. This will not look the same for everyone and that is okay.

A viable concern, in regards to the Pfizer vaccine is that it contains phthalates and the reaction to this has caused anaphylactic shock, and death in some patients. Some numbers suggest that about 44% of the adult population is allergic (or at least sensitive) to phthalates. And the CDC even warns of possible complications from this on their website. (Keep in mind: these companies cannot be held accountable for either immediate or longterm vaccine related injury or reactions.) https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/volumes/70/wr/mm7002e1.htm?fbclid=IwAR3LvEuaKNrsktxCdSviZyOjll09DnKwgWwfq__08hDP4XRUEIdEOMZIH8Q

My observation from a larger and deeper perspective:

The whole COVID process has been, at its root, so much about how we deal with fear and the reactivation of trauma.

So many people have suffered so much loss at so many levels. The virus took its toll on our mental, emotional, physical and relational health. Even as we re-open, we we are still reeling and will be processing this for many years to come, in many ways.

This is real. It happened. And we have all been deeply affected.

It has been a physical and psychospiritual event. It is immature, ignorant, and utterly lacking in common sense and compassion to simply tell people, "If you keep your vibe high and stay out of fear, then you will be immune."

I call bullshit and spiritual bypass on that mentality.

We need to tend to our fears and our bodies—both are real. We need to be concerned for our personal well being, as well as the well being of others. And we need to, to the degree that we are able, look at the energetic dynamics at play within events like this, and in the smaller scope of our own lives.

Some of the underlying and overarching tactics that have been applied throughout the pandemic need to be acknowledged. This has been both spiritual, and psychological warfare—the gasllighting, misinformation, control mechanisms, power grabbing, greater consolidation of wealth among the elite, and the dissolution of personal autonomy—are all deeply destabilizing tactics designed to keep us in various states of trance and dissociation where we have the least access to source, resources and each other as human allies.

There are psychospiritual fields at work here (Wetiko) that we are all susceptible to, and that we are all already infected by. We need to be vigilant and compassionate in dealing with them in ourselves and in the world.

All of that is as real as the virus.

This is also economic destabilization. We need only to look at who has come out billions of dollars ahead while regular citizens and small businesses have suffered irrecoverable losses.

"a week after President Donald Trump declared a national emergency – America’s 614 billionaires grew their net worth by a collective $931 billion." Bezos, Elon Musk, etc. Here are the 30 billionaires that have done exceedingly well while the majority suffer. https://www.usatoday.com/story/money/2020/12/01/american-billionaires-that-got-richer-during-covid/43205617/?fbclid=IwAR2FUKIlz54n4NXoHHizpJzfIQxzfiNFCM-m9NoQUm7c4bdsOIIlxl5YXcM205617/

Yes, COVID contributed to countless deaths and suffering—more irrecoverable losses—and people are rightfully grieving. My heart breaks for the sadness of it all. This, too, will take years to recover from.

This entire experience has also been about how we manage our biggest fears.

Are we more afraid of interaction with organic materials, (virus) or are we more afraid of interacting with artificial intelligence (vaccine) and the subsequent energetic fields that surround each? Are we more afraid of, or destabilized by possible illness or isolation?

And, maybe, we are not afraid, but we are aware.

I am aware of my own and other's anxiety and depression throughout this time. I am aware of people who lost their jobs, their homes and succumbed to relapse, spousal abuse, divorce and suicide—more irrecoverable losses.

I am aware of the level of sensitivity that my body has to foreign compounds, the way my lymph nodes swell when I use common deodorants, the way my skin dries out and is prone agitation and hair loss when I use products that contain phthalates.

I trust my immune system more than I trust a vaccine that has not been fully tested. I trust my interaction with my environment to keep upgrading my system, more than I would trust the flu vaccine, or what I suspect will become a booster COVID vaccine because the virus (as they do) will keep mutating.

I'm also learning about terrain theory which plays more into the interdependence of systems and essentially says: don't attempt to eradicate a problem; tend to its environmental origins. When we over sterilize everything we disrupt our microbiome, which is where our immune system originates.

I do not deny that science—or that vaccines—have saved lives. There is evidence that shows that it has and we absolutely need modern medicine and science. We also have the right to question it and determine which applications are right for us. We have the right to ask and research: What are dangers, what are the payoffs—what are the consequences of our beliefs, decisions and practices?

We have the right and responsibility to be make informed and consensual decisions about our health and our bodies.

My hope for us—moving forward—is that we do not try to go backwards. We cannot go back. But that we find ways to continue learn more about ourselves, our experiences with others, the world in which we live, and all the ways that it operates and how we show up in it.

My hope is that we continue to seek out information, and that we get better at practicing compassion as we--individually and collectively—mend, heal and grow together.

Author: Justice Bartlett